Dukes Dukes It Out – Gets KOed

[Jeff Winick]

This just in from the DUMP hotline:

One day prior to Tampa Bay announcing the return of Delmon Young from his suspension, they found an able bodied replacement for the suspended list.

As reported in Baseball America:

More bad news came down in Durham, as the Devil Rays suspended outfielder Elijah Dukes indefinitely and sent him home to Tampa after Dukes got into an altercation with teammate Ryan Knox in front of the elevator at the club?s hotel while they were on the road in Charlotte on Saturday night.

While the organization had little to say publicly about the incident, Dukes said he was told only to leave the team and added that the 6-foot-1, 184-pound Knox started the fight, and he said he would be cleared of any wrongdoing.

“I don’t know what’s going on right now,” he said. “I haven’t heard from
anybody.”

This is the second time Dukes has been sent home this season, but the first time the Rays have announced a suspension for the 21-year-old outfielder.

More to follow……

Jeffrey Winick
DUMP

[Richard Robbins]

I told Brad that Elijah was too much of a hot head. (I still love the
name though)

[Brad Jansen]

Dear Jeff:

Thanks for the crime report. Poor lad probably needed some tough love on father’s day. Maybe a game, er sport of golf would have tamed the beast within. Anyway, the Riptorns stand behind this man who has a big heart, a boatload of talent and unusually quick fists. But with this sorry news, I am filing away my prospects portfolio until your newsletter/magazine gets published next spring (assuming, of course, you can raise enough funds from your family and your law firm’s credit line to get the thing to press). I don’t want to hear anymore about anyone’s “prospects” (especially yours, Andy, whoever you think they are) in any further trade proposals. The only good news is that at least I didn’t trade for the guy…

Brad The Bedraggled

[Andy Klein]

Jeff-

This message sounds like it came from C.O.P.S. headquarters!

-Andy

[Jeff Winick]

Andy,

And that is why a DUMP membership is the vastly superior option. We at DUMP pride ourselves on offering all the services a dude who uses minor league prospects requires. COPS underestimates the informational needs of an effective dumper/dumpee. A true minor league aficionado, like, for example, Rich Robbins, will use this information to retrieve his former prospect at a discount.

Gentlemen – we’re still accepting applications. Hurry on in before the charter membership discount period ends.

Jeff Winick
DUMP

[Richard Robbins]

No way. Jeff wants Elijah and is trying to diminish his significant DUMP market value.

[Jeff Winick]

Andy,

What did I tell you? Try as he might, Rich can’t mask his NEED to reacquire a former Red Hot prospect, particularly one who was batting .290+ with a near .390 OBP before the fisticuffs.

That is all.

Jeffrey Winick
DUMP

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