“Why, Carmona?” With apologies to the Knack and Hoosier Daddies

[Brad Jansen]

Ooh my little shitty one, shitty one
When you gonna get me a save, Carmona?
Giving up another run, another run
Runnin’ outta time, Carmona
Never gonna close, give it up
Such a timid kind, pitches always up, not the closer kind
Why why why… wooooo!
W W W Why, Carmona?

Thought I bought a closer huh, did I huh
Even better than Klein’s, Carmona
Keeping me in misery, it gets to me
Another double down the line, Carmona
Never gonna close, give it up
Puts me in a bind — is he pitching blind
Can I trade to Klein
Why why why…woooo!
W W W why, Carmona?

When you gonna save for me, save for me
No one likes to hear me whine, Carmona
This is not my fantasy, fantasy
More mockery from Jeffery
Never gonna close, give it up
Such a timid kind, pitches always up, not the closer kind
Why why why…woooooooo
W w w why Carmona?

[Rick Gammons]

Brad;

Cute. Just be prepared to pen new lyrics along the lines of “Under My Thumb” when Fausto gets his electric stuff under control!!

Rick
p.s. As a Ramones fan, I thought you’d pull out the old classic “Carbona Not Glue”!

[Brad Jansen]

Rick: Shhhhh.

Don’t let these owners know you’re a Ramones fan. Some of them can’t be trusted.

Brad

[Doug Shabelman]

Brad/Rick-

As everyone knows by now, The Ramones are anti-war, anti-conservative, so thanks for drawing the attention of the NSA to our humble little threads of trades, barbs and roasts. Hey Cheney, will you take a look at Miggy Tejada’s visa for me?

[Brad Jansen]

Actually, ill-advised Doug the Smug, it was either Joey or Johnny (Rick, help me here) who was quite the conservative, leading to many battles within the band. But they’re all up in Rock ‘N Roll Heaven now so all we have is their music, which is good enough for me, whatever the politics.

So, Jeffrey, how ya doin’ with those numbers? And why are you catching up to me in the standings? I haven’t even traded Thome!

And a note to fellow risk-takers: my ’07 pen is set for next year; if you want to make an offer for a $5 Fernando Cabrera, future Tribe closer, offer away. Privately.

[Author]

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