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The Flaming Brats owe me compensation for that punch!
-Andy
Love the Bo Jackson article in the background!
He’s available. Make an offer!
-Andy
It’s true. I asked Jeff to lay off Derek Holland and said he should hex the Bombers instead. One hour later …
Now will everyone stop sticking pins in their Yordano Ventura voo-doo dolls?!
-Andy
An excellent trade between the Rips active and reserve rosters.
My problem is that the first half of my team was swindled for drunk-driving minor leaguers, .220-hitting Cuban outfielders on long-term contracts, and — good grief! — Lonnie Chisenhall.
Maybe it’s time to start playing for 2015. Mark Kerber, your guidance please …
-Andy
Ironic — the untucked look also works for unfit older guys like me. Maybe I’ll wear a “Tommy Bahama” shirt to the draft this year!
-Andy
Reminds me of pictures of Hugh Hefner and his fiances. Doug … you’re not so young any more. Bring Adams with you next time ..
-Andy
Dear Deans Robbins and Kerber,
Please send me the grade appeal process!
-K9
Damn! I thought for sure I’d catch Jeff for the “bride’s maid” lead. But Jim B. looks almost certain to pass me. Let’s start digging up third place finishes …
-Andy
Dear Sad,
Only if Team A’s owner can get Matt Wieters in return.
Best wishes,
The Professor
At first I got excited when I saw that Jeffrey declared the K-9 as frontrunners based, in part, on a lack of injuries. Then I surfed over to rotoworld.com, and saw the following: Braden to the DL. A-Rod out with oblique/back problems. Gutierrez going to the Mayo Clinic instead of rehab. … Thanks for nothing, Jeff.
Anyway, a bit of history about Pippin’s projections. Before Pippin (may she rest in peace) was a gleam in her mother’s eyes, I published the “Candy Ass Projections.” Those were a response to Winick’s post-draft calculations that always found his team the best, while declaring Alex Liberman’s team the worst. Alex didn’t like that, and since one of his pet phrases was “candy ass” (whatever that means), a responsive document was produced. The following year, Pippin arrived and Pippin’s Projections were born, soon followed by Pippin’s Nothing But a Dog commentary from Jeff/Shandler, et al.
As for this year’s version, I’m calling the Calamari the favorite based on the quaint idea that Jim’s roster has the best players. Of course, one never knows what a Wieters, a Wood, or a temporarily-insane Mark Blocker will do to the dynamic of a pennant race. So it should be a fun season!
-Andy
I’m interested, but Kerber told me that my personal trade deadline expired …
-Andy
Wow. First, Mark starts playing roto like Brad by turning his magic
beans into a roster full of stars. Now, he’s writing emails that sound
like Brad! As Mark cruises to toward The Wieters, I suggest that we
change his team name. No longer is it “Block’s Bombers”. From here on
out, I will refer to his squad as “The Little Rippers.”That is all.
-Andy
Must have been an awful heavy spider on that pillow . . .