[USML Announce] A Pulitzer For Jeffrey?

[jhwinick at aol.com]

Mr. B.,

Nothing would give me greater pleasure (or be of greater surprise) than to have the honor of providing you with an appropriate moniker upon a long (very, very long) overdue crown.? So many possibilities come to mind.....

Glad you chose to include that last letter.? Remember your family values, if only for Buddha's sake.

And thank you as well for the good wishes on my restored fitness.? I'll do my best to stick around for a?long time.??Given your objective, I figure I'll need at least another 30-40 years.

Jeff?


-----Original Message-----
From: Blocker, Mark B. <mblocker at Sidley.com>
To: USML Announcements <announce at usml.net>
Sent: Thu, 22 Jan 2009 3:19 pm
Subject: RE: [USML Announce] A Pulitzer For Jeffrey?





Toefuki:

?

? It is a distinct honor to have bestowed your new name upon you.? I toyed with some variations on that name (such as leaving off the last letter), but I decided this was the most appropriate way to honor the memory of your already-passed-on, Bush-era?crown.? I will allow you to come up with an appropriate name for me after the Bombers are crowned champions in October.

?

? However, I must demur on the photo.? I have never been big on poking fun at the picture (although I may have partaken) and do not think I coined that as a common refrain; I think that is Klein territory.? I have seen the new svelte Winick, and find it inspirational that you gotten yourself back to the fit version of you.? It will allow you to live longer, which gives me many more opportunities down the road to best you at roto.

?

? -- Mark B.



From: announce-bounces at usml.net [mailto:announce-bounces at usml.net] On Behalf Of jhwinick at aol.com
Sent: Thursday, January 22, 2009 3:00 PM
To: announce at usml.net
Subject: Re: [USML Announce] A Pulitzer For Jeffrey?




Brad Lee,

It appears to be your literary genius that is worthy of praise rather than my own.? The consonance in "tattooed tower of trouble" is beautiful.? Of course, it belongs to you, not me.? I don't believe I commented on Mr. Hamilton at all.? The same is true of Sherrill.? And while I did address Wood, my comments were more detailed and, not surprisingly, far more glowing.? Since you got things right for Verlander, it is clear that you bought the magazine and I thank you for that.

To Mr. Klein, I express my heartfelt disappointment that the Klein reference was once again cut.? I'm afraid that I have yet to find a way to weave you into a comment that isn't inscrutible to everyone but those on this mailing list.? In the meantime, you still have Alex P's autograph that I brought you back from Arizona a few years ago.? That will have to suffice until I try once again next year.

To Mr. Blocker, I'm sure you'll be pleased to note that they failed to replace my caricature, so its still Jaba the Hut next to my name.? More importantly, if I haven't yet said so, thank you for coming up with TOeFuKi.? Not only does it save a few keystrokes, but its fun to say.? And you must know how much it means to me that?you're willing to acknowledge my status.? Truly humbling.

And by the way, does anyone know of a spam filter that will prevent me from ever again having to read an email with the words Brad Jansen, Jessica Biel and Mrs. Hand in the same paragraph?? 

That is all.

TOeFuKi


-----Original Message-----
From: Brad Jansen <bljansen at gmail.com>
To: USML Announcements <announce at usml.net>
Sent: Thu, 22 Jan 2009 1:03 pm
Subject: [USML Announce] A Pulitzer For Jeffrey?



Ricky G, I have no idea what you sent cos my firewalls always spam yer stuff but I'm breathless cos I just picked up my oh-nine edition of Fantasy Baseball Guide and I gotta say, Jeffrey, it was a choice between Maxim and your mag and all I can say is Jessica Biel is just gonna have to wait for Mrs. Hand and?who cares about? your picture when you write as pretty as you do....if the Pulitzer Prize Committee establishes an award in the non-fiction category for fantasy baseball my gawd your the first one canonized I swear....your words, your analysis, your?insight....about Josh Hamilton, Lord Jeffrey says: "No price is too high for this tattooed?tower of trouble...."???? About George Sherrill he muses, "This lefty twirler last year closed the door on those who doubted his ability to?amass saves...bid early and bid heavy."?? When it comes to Justin Verlander, he opines, "Expect a return to prom inence for the Tigers and their ace." (So that's cool cos we get baseball team standings projected for us, too).....?And of course there's Brandon Wood: "Go get this guy."? It's terse, yet poignant. I laughed, I cried, I'm never going to stop reading this.

?

Next year Jeff will try writing his analysis in haiku.? I've already pre-ordered.

?

Brad The Breathless



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