<div>Dear Professor Klein:</div>
<div> I drafted Dayan Viciedo for one dollar. You know that, don't you?</div>
<div>--Bewildered Brad</div>
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<div>Dear Professor:</div>
<div> Are your reserve pitchers so bad that you don't bother to reserve Nick Blackburn singing in the dead of night?</div>
<div>--Kerbs</div>
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<div>Dear Professor:</div>
<div> My receivables are down because of the inordinate amount of time I'm spending to lay the ground work for my offseaon's trades (starting with that albatross Matusz). Can I charge admission to next year's draft?</div>
<div>--Jeff the Deposed King Winick </div>
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<div>Dear Professor:</div>
<div> Should I buy that Tigers' Alburquerque tee shirt I've had my eyes on all year? </div>
<div>--Mark Bombed Blocker</div>
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<div>Dear Professor:</div>
<div> Where am I?</div>
<div>Doug "Bang My Conger Drum Slowly" Shabeleman</div>
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<div>Dear Professor:</div>
<div> When will Winick stop trying to trade me Matt Thornton?</div>
<div>Jim I Can't Barrett</div>
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<div>Dear Professor:</div>
<div> Buddha's gone this season and several Middle East dictators have fallen. Any correlation?</div>
<div>Rick "Love my Tank" Gammons</div>
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<div>Dear Professor:</div>
<div> I'd like to send you an advance copy of the photojournal commemoration of my 20111 championship season. It's called <em>I, Red Hot</em>. What's your address?</div>
<div>Rich Red Hot Robbins</div>
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