The Scarlet Sausages’ pennant hopes today took a walk on the dark side of the Street–Huston Street, that is, the “closer” with the soaring ERA and aching chest muscle.
“As hard as it is for me to limit any statement to a single word,” observed the canny Jeffery Winick, “Here it goes: steroids. Overuse results in chest muscle damage, baldness and shrunken testicles. Trust me. I know all about this stuff. I read about it in this muscle magazine I posed for.* No doubt about it.”
The even worse news for round Robbins is that Winick’s Steal of the Draft, Dan Miceli, stole another save from fledgling fireman Chad Orvella. “Dan is the Man,” exclaimed Winick. “I know it made Shabes sick to his stomach to hear me say it so much at the draft, but it’s true. Now excuse me, it’s time for Letterman…”
*Fantasy Boys Prospectus, Big Hurt Ed. (March 2006)