“It’s not enough that the Rips’ active roster is dotted with a bunch of $5 and under producers like Teahan, Markakis, Kendrick, Kubel and Greinke,” sniffed the somewhat cumbersome Roto Master Jeffrey Winick, “But one must marvel at the assembly of prospects that will mark the Riptorns’ 2007 reserve list. Each one is salaried at $5 or less, and each one makes any pundit’s top 50 list, and most fall within the top 30. Take a look at this talent: Alex Gordon, Brandon Wood, Evan Longoria, Billy Butler, Adam Jones, Adam Lind and Jacoby Ellsbury…
“My very real fear this season is that this was to be *my* year, the year in which I win it all, through domination and force of will, the year in which my fellow owners recognize my genius and mastery of all things roto…but now I am concerned that at least some of my thunder will be stolen as the league gets enchanted by the promise and performance of the Riptorns’ fine young men, and that troubles me…”