[USML Announce] Latest Baldelli DL Stint Leaves Berliners Sinking Like A Rocco

[Brad Jansen]

It's been unusually quiet around the Berliners compound these days and it
has nothing to do with the passing of Rev. Falwell.  It's just that the best
and brightest of Winick's roto associates are having a difficult time
cobbling together a competing team for the busy attorney.  Winick did spare
a few seconds to talk to this reporter about the State of the Berliners.

"Now that Baldelli has gone down again, it's all over but the shouting,"
Winick muttered.  "I cannot continue to embarass myself by relying on the
likes of Andy Marte, Mark Kotsay and Bobby Kielty--and they're already on
the DL!  See Joe Crede play recently? The guy can barely wipe his ass let
alone hit a ball out of the infield--his back is shot. Sexson --my big
thumper-- is hitting a robust .171 and Frank Thomas' latest hot streak has
bumped his fat BA all the way up to .236.  That won't cut it, dear readers.

"No matter that I drafted the best pitching staff in USML history.  With my
team's woeful hitting I'll be grateful to finish ahead of the Nukes and Rips
this year, least of all the Bombers...

"So Shabes...Blocker...Robbins: listen to me because I don't have time to
repeat myself: I am not trading guys like Putz and Hughes so I can sniff the
Klein 9's dog droppings.  Don't bother me with your trade proposals and your
empty words of encouragement.  My season is over...and I didn't even have a
chance to trade for Scott Podsednik.  I will devote the rest of this season
to update my anlayses of various teams that strike my fancy. That type of
thing amuses me. Oh, and maybe sniff around for some dump trade action, if
Andy will allow it..."
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: http://lyra.siteprotect.com/pipermail/announce/attachments/20070517/be47c031/attachment.htm